Divorce can be an ugly, nasty business for sure. For this reason, many couples feel the best way to avoid the worst of the unpleasantness of divorce is to simply avoid using attorneys. This is a mistake. Attorneys actually provide a number of different services that can significantly aid in parting ways more graciously. Here are 3 pitfalls of trying to get a divorce without legal counsel.
Almost invariably, in any couple, one person wants a divorce more than the other person. What this often leads to is the person who genuinely doesn’t want a divorce being overly accommodating to the person who wants the divorce. Where things really get ugly is if the person who wants the divorce accepts the overly accommodating offers of the person who doesn’t. Eventually, that person is going to figure out that the divorce is going to happen whether they like it or not and their accommodations are going to lead to their needs getting trampled. At that point in time, they will often get angry and that’s when things get ugly. Attorneys can help their clients stay grounded in reality from the start so things don’t get nasty when reality finally sets in.
Not everyone who utters the words “I want a divorce” genuinely wants a divorce. In many cases, what individuals really want is a solution to an intolerable situation and they simply can’t see any solution other than divorce. Contrary to popular opinion, divorce attorneys are not vultures looking for clients at all costs. In many cases, attorneys would actually like to see their clients stay together if possible. Attorneys can help steer couples toward other solutions to explore before settling on divorce as their best option.
Even the most amicable divorce is going to have some ugly moments. But in divorces where both parties attempt to remain calm and rational – often with a lot of help from their attorneys – couples can often regain some sense of goodwill towards their former mate. When things turn ugly, brutal and nasty, however, that can make healing and repairing from the experience take just that much longer – and may never happen. Attorneys can help couples move through their divorce in a more equitable fashion, which can leave them in a much better place once the ink is dry.
While pursuing a divorce without an attorney may seem to save you some money up front, what it can cost you, in the long run, may not be worth it. Emotions run high in divorces and things can go from Mary Poppins to Charles Manson in the blink of an eye. When it comes to Divorce Matters, save yourself the emotional trauma and seek out a good attorney.